My Self Concept

 

 1. Physical Characteristics: dark-haired, straight hair, petite

 2. Social Traits: outgoing, talkative, compassionate, funny, and emotional.

3. Social Roles: daughter, friend, student, leader

4. Defining Interests: work-out enthusiast, movie enthusiast,                                                                                           nutrition and lifestyle coach

                                                                   5. Talents: artistic, athletic, intellectual 

                                                                   6. Belief Systems: Christian, feminist,                                                                                             transcendentalism,                                                                                                                      progressivism  

 How do I perceive myself? How has my communication with Significant Others/Generalized Other contributes to my perception?

Most often I perceive myself through my important social roles such as a daughter, friend and a community leader. To me, these social roles are what makes me different from others, because I put a lot of emphasis on my social life since I am talkative, outgoing and a responsible person. Moreover, I perceive myself as responsible, trustworthy and honorable, because I am an intellectual feminist-student. To dig a little deeper into my personality, I can assure you that significant others do influence my perception the most. Since childhood, I have been taught to be respectful and subordinate to adults and self-monitored around people who have a higher social status than myself.

 My mother, in particular, had ( still has) the greatest impact on how I perceive myself. Whenever I would let her down, I would get really upset and cry ( still do). To be honest, I was a trouble girl around my dad and never listened, but around my mom, I was an angel! From my earliest childhood, my mother struggled to earn money, so she had 3-4 jobs, just to raise me and my brother. She is a very strong woman, who has gone through lots of emotional, and physical abuse as well as financial hardships. Today, at age 18, I strive to be as resilient and as tough as she was for me when I was a kid. No wonder, I have a huge scoop of feministic beliefs. My mother also finished college, so as a college student right now I strongly emphasize my school work and have a strong, conditioned work ethic ever since elementary school. 

To add on, my mother's side of family is huge and they are very social, positive, and talkative! As a kid, a spent much of my summer with my extended family relatives at European parties filled with music, dancing and rowdy atmosphere. Now, as a young adult, I find myself craving for rowdy social atmosphere, where I can talk and socialize. I cannot be an introvert even if I tried, because my experience with family and generalized others: mother's mom, dad, aunts, uncles has taught me to be social and extroverted. 

How specific Direct Definitions and Identity Scripts have lead me to reflect on my reflected appraisal?

Identity scrips in school and at home lead me to realize that people should see me in a specific way. For example, in high school I was a part of National Honors Society, which had four mantras: service, leadership, scholarship, and character. By being an NHS student- I wanted others to view myself as a student of excellent service, so I participated at various volunteer services throughout high school, which then convinced me to do some of the community work outside of school, which I am involved in right now. My NHS sponsors viewed me as a responsible student and a student willing to give back to the community by volunteering, so that is who I became and still is to this day. I love volunteering, because it brings me back to the community and expands my social life with others who influence me in it. 

How has the Generalized Other sent me messages through various forms of cultural communication that have created Identity Scripts for how I behave and perceive myself?

Much of my childhood was spent with family! I have attended many European parties, where I
was taught to be polite whenever entering someone's house.  European family parties were my Identity Scripts, because much of my etiquette and behavior was taught and mastered when I was around many significant others or stranger family friends. For example, due to my European Identity Scrips- I was taught that taking your shoes off when entering someone else's house is very important to show respect for the wonderful hospitality of the person who invited you. You can imagine how I felt quiet uncomfortable going into an American household, because my friend's mom told me to keep my shoes on! I was very surprised! However, whenever I would go to Korean and Indian household-my instinct was to take my shoes off since it wasn't an American household! LOL

 

Do I live up to the definitions and scripts Significant/Particular and the Generalized Other established for me?

I do not always live up to definitions and scripts of my European etiquette and behavior, because I have been influenced by feminist and liberal beliefs and my friends outside of my household. For example, in a standard European household, a woman is ought to tidy up the house everyday and wash dishes. This was not enough for my family, so I have to take care of

my dog, walk it and clean out my cat's litter, take the trash out, pick up mail while still catching up to 15 credits of my classes. It is overwhelming and I no longer enjoy being a standard European woman! My feministic views prevent me from "enjoying" my household duties, because I believe that everyone is supposed to do their part to keep the house clean and running, not just women. 

To provide another example, without a word I am expected to clean my room every week. I did this as a child and still do it as young adult.  I have been exposed to this through my Identity Scripts, because I would always help my mother clean the house whenever she would be expected home late from her third job. I have been conditioned to clean my room, but it is actually enjoyable, because both me and my brother is expected to clean our own rooms. However, this is not the same with dish-washing and dog-walking, because I am expected to this because I am a girl and my responsibilities are to clean the house. 

 Do you see a connection between these expectations and self-esteem? How has this impacted my feelings towards myself?

I do see a strong connection, because whenever I did not fulfil the expectations of a standard

European woman, I would feel upset with myself and upset that I have let my mother ( significant other) down. Since I am an emotional person I tend to take things close to heart when I feel upset and this results in a  drastic blow to my self-esteem. It takes me weeks to recover and I become negative if significant others disprove of me. To an emotional person, every upsetting feeling feels like the end of the world! Letting my mother down is the most horrific thing I could ever do. My self-esteem is quiet low, because I care what my significant others feel towards me. My self-esteem is negatively impacted, because I feel like I have failed as a daughter and as a social role model. I tend to act and behave aggressively when I get upset, because I am forced to fulfill expectations that I do not enjoy.